Tuesday, February 23, 2010

Monday, February 22, 2010

Bubbles

Kyler and Taegen picked out a HUGE thing of bubbles for me for Valentines Day. Precious, I know. Within 30 minutes this is what happened....The ENTIRE bottle was on the floor and our new recliner....(i.e. empty bottle)
As a result, Kyler had to sit in time-out....(notice the wet bubbly pajamas)
Finally, he had to clean it up....you can't tell in the pic but the vacuum isn't even touching the floor. He's still learning that part of the clean-up process.
Thanks for the bubbles boys.

Wednesday, February 10, 2010

Poopy Floor

Kyler has a fetish with taking off his clothes lately. Sunday morning he woke up and then started taking off his clothes. He got completely naked went in the kitchen, squatted, pooped and peed, stepped in it and started walking away.

I saw it. Grabbed Kyler and handed him off to Ryan. I cleaned up the floor while Ryan was cleaning up Kyler. Ryan sat Kyler on the toilet and Kyler squirmed off and landed on Ryan's foot so Ryan's foot got all poopy too.

Good times.

Friday, February 5, 2010

Superman....

We had some GOOD times with the beanbag and grandpa. The pics say it all.

Wednesday, January 27, 2010

Randomness...

A few random things:

How can you not smile when you look in the front room and see this. (Kyler "helping" put together a puzzle). He has this fetish thing lately where he LOVES to take off his clothes. His shirt is usually off within minutes of getting off the bus - then his pants (and diaper) shortly thereafter. What the?

I love how looking at the boys is like looking at stairs even though Taeg's and Kyler are the same age and Strider is 2 1/2 years behind. The difference in height between Strides and Kyler is about the same as between Kyler and Taegen. Love these boys. Me and the boys made a trip to the zoo on Saturday (without Ryan who was working :() because it was 47 degrees. Today it's freezing but we took advantage of the "nice" weather while we could.

Thursday, January 21, 2010

Down Syndrome.

Every now and again I have to re-accept the fact that I have a child with Ds. When Kyler was 1 1/2 my mom gave me a book called "Gifts: Mothers Reflect on How Children with Down Syndrome Enrich Their Lives". It is a bunch of entries from mom's about the time they found out their child had Ds. Since reading this book and it's sequel "Gifts 2" I have been wanting to write my story. But whenever I try...I can't. Not because I don't want to but I can't put my feelings into words. I can't pick the moments that I would want to share and the ones to leave out. I can't describe the immense pain and sorrow I feel at times but also the amazing amounts of love and joy. I have written my story a few times and it never fully captures the essence of what I want it to say. Mine's not going to be published in any book - I just want it for me. I want it for Kyler. I want it for Taegen.

"Gifts 2" is the sequel and it contains entries from moms, grandparents, siblings, teachers, coaches of people with Down syndrome. It made me realize that I was not the only one affected by Kyler's diagnosis. I really didn't get that until reading this book. I felt alone in my feelings and I still do but it's different knowing that other people had/have to accept this diagnosis too. My parents had to deal with Ds when Kyler was born, just like Ryan's parents did. I am curious to know their stories too.

One of my resolutions this year was to write my story and give it to my parents and Ryan's parents with a copy of "Gifts 2". So far, this resolution has been unattainable because I can't express myself. I can't express myself while still capturing everything I feel. I know that it's still January and I still have 11 months to complete this resolution but I have been trying to put on paper my experiences for 2 years now and so far it hasn't worked. Every so often I have to "re-accept" Ds. I NEED to read blogs of other parents with a child with Ds. I have to cry. I have to re-read "Gifts 1 & 2". I have to feel alone. Then I pick myself up and get back to loving all my boys.

I have heard people say countless times to both Ryan and I that Kyler is very lucky to have us as his parents and there couldn't be a better family for him. While I am flattered by these comments, I don't believe we are that different than other family out there doing the best they can to raise their children. I think that just maybe these children come into our lives to teach us... and because they have something to give to us, not because we have something special to give to them. Kyler was once given a blessing that said Kyler's disability is a protection for not only Kyler but for our whole family. I honestly cannot think of one thing I have taught Kyler (or Taegen or Strider) that they couldn't have gotten from any other well-intentioned parent, but I do know they have taught us more about life simply by there presence than we could learn from anyone else. It is this thought that keeps me going on the days when I feel overwhelmed and alone. So, I guess I will keep trying to write my story and maybe, just maybe, one day I will be able to capture the essence of what I want to say.
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Saturday, January 2, 2010

Say Cheese.


I LOVE our new family photo. I love Taegen's cheese because this is totally how he smiles with super squinty eyes. Totally Taegen. Then there is Kyler who has just pulled his hands away from his face playing peek-a-boo with the photographer. This also explains why Taegen's head is popping out to say peek-a-boo. Strider is just SO cute with his little grin and dimple. Notice how I had to hold his hands down because he too was playing peek-a-boo. Ryan just looks like a freaking, super hot daddy/husband. I, don't look too bad, if I say so myself. So all in all, a GREAT photo.

I totally wanted to buy another picture. It was of Taegen and Kyler standing back to back with HUGE grins on their faces. Then there was another one with them standing back to back with heads turned to look at each other with huge grins. I LOVED how it showed the difference in height. But, I didn't get it. I stuck to the $9.95 package of one photo.

P.S. the picture is not lopsided or has a line at the bottom - that, would be my scan job.

Saturday, October 24, 2009

My little miracle.

3 years ago today Kyler's heart was repaired. What a miracle.What a difference 3 years can make...Look what a big boy he is today!!

Tuesday, September 15, 2009

School Pictures

I really didn't want to have to pay for school pictures. But, I felt kind of obligated since it was Kyler's first one. I decided to opt for the cheapest package available for $13, because, let's face it, most school pictures are not that great. But then I got his pics back today and just look at him... Now I wish I had an 8X10, coasters, wallets and a huge blanket with his picture on it. I just think they are so cute. He looks so grown up and big. My baby boy...getting big school pictures. Aww!

Saturday, September 5, 2009

Ky guy

So, I just got the letters and information for the Annual Down Syndrome Buddy Walk. It is October 10th. Whenever I get these letters, I don't know what to think. On one hand I really don't feel like I belong to that "Down Syndrome" group. On the other hand, it would be really great to get to know other people who have a child with Down syndrome. In my mind, Kyler is extremely high functioning and I know that at some point in time he will do EVERYTHING Taegen and other little kids do. Right now he is working on riding a bike. Last year he was working on walking. Now he runs, jumps off everything, rolls, etc. I don't ever want to underestimate him but I also need to remember that he does have Down syndrome. We also get a lot of pamphlets and stuff from Special Olympics. I usually throw it away. I want my kid to play sports with all the other kids. I want Taegen and Kyler to be on the same team. I don't want him to get preferential treatment BUT what if he does need preferential treatment. I don't want to hold him back from things that would be fabulous for him just because I don't want to deal with the label of "special needs or special Olympics." See. My thoughts are sometimes confused about what I think about having a child with "special needs". I know that he is special just like I know that Taegen and Strider are special. I know that he has Down syndrome. I also have really grown to hate the R word - retard. I have decided that when I hear people say that I call them on it. Some of you may attest to that. I don't do this to make the other people feel stupid or rude. I do it to help others be aware that that word is offensive. I would hope that it would be offensive to everybody and not just a mom with a special needs kid. Although, I used to say it too, which makes me feel bad. It's funny how perspective changes everything. I worked at a special needs camp when I was like 13 years old or something. I was assigned to be with a Down syndrome girl for 3 days - day and night. I HATED her. Seriously, hate is putting it nicely. I could not handle her at all. Then when I found out about Kyler I thought I was being punished for hating this little girl. Don't get me wrong. I was extremely nice to her and totally did my job for the duration of the camp. I didn't fall in love with her at all but I was very nice and helpful. I LOVE Kyler, that's probably an understatement. I don't love him more or less than Taegen and Strider. I love all my kids differently but the same. Does that make sense? I think if I worked at that camp now, I would probably still really not like her. Just because I have a child with Down syndrome doesn't mean that I LOVE everybody that has Down syndrome. That's like saying, because I have Taegen, I will LOVE all little boys. Ya right! I don't. Most kids bug me. However, because I have a Down syndrome son I can relate more so than others would to parents or people with Down syndrome. It's like this. Before I had kids, Ryan and I hung out and did a lot with our young, married, no-kids friends. After we had kids, we didn't have as much in common with them. We were still friends but we made new friends. Friends with kids. Friends with families. So, maybe I should make NEW friends with people who have a Down syndrome child. It's not a necessity but it might be nice to compare stories and feelings. Maybe then, I wouldn't have to vent about my random thoughts on my blog.

I ADORE my boys. I really do. They always amaze me and make me laugh and make me happy and really are my driving force. Anyways, I don't really know what the point is to this long, rambling post. Other than the fact that maybe I really haven't dealt with Kyler's diagnosis to the point that I thought I had. Maybe I will just have hard times and good times. Maybe no matter how much I accept his diagnosis - I really won't ever REALLY accept it. I want him to have all the opportunities as my other boys. I want him to be treated the same. I want him to be loved. I want him to play sports and go to school with all the other kids his age. I want him to be happy.

Sunday, August 30, 2009

Life's Hassles...

Insurance is sometimes a pain in the rear. It seems like all day today I have been making calls about some form of insurance question or something.

  • Kyler's old preschool called because they need information from the EOB. We have been playing phone tag for a few days now. It's weird because the insurance pays us but then we have to forward everything to the preschool but then I need my copies and whatever.
  • Then I had to call to see about Strider's tubes. If I go to Riley (which is where I have always gone) they can't see him until mid-October. If I go to a different doctor then it will be in two weeks. So I had to call and cancel the Riley appt and then call a different ENT and make appointment. Then I had to call insurance to make sure it was covered and the provider was a-ok.
  • This is the one that really bugs. Kyler needs a car seat that goes up to 80 pounds in a 5-point harness. They have these at Walmart and such but they are like $200. I usually buy the cheap, yet effective, car seats. So I called Kyler's insurance a couple weeks ago to see if they covered the car seat. They said to get a letter of medical intent and a prescription from the Dr and take it to Freedom Mobility. So I did this, except that Freedom Mobility doesn't exist. So I called insurance again and they gave me 5 other places to try. I tried ALL of them and sent paperwork and everything. Then it was a NO-go. So now I called the insurance company back and they said "Oh, because you can buy it at a store we won't cover it." I was like "What the crap! Seriously, I told you that the first time I called and you told me to do all these things and now you're telling me they won't cover it anyways." Alright, I really didn't say that. I wanted to but didn't.
After all that, I have a hard time getting mad or frustrated at insurance because my lil' Kyler boy cost well over $300,000 in his first 8 months of life. Of which we had to pay a small amount. If not for insurance we would be in TROUBLE. So, I guess I will keep making menial phone calls and just deal. eh?

Tuesday, August 25, 2009

Say Cheese...

Today is Kyler's picture day at school. I told him to smile for his pictures before he left for school. That got the boys' started. They LOVE for me to tell them NOT to smile...then they smile. If I tell them to smile they don't. Only if I tell them NOT too. Maybe that explains why they disobey me in other things too. How enlightening! I'll have to try telling them to hit each other and to not clean up their toys....we'll see!
Seriously...I ADORE these boys!

Back to School...

Kyler started school today. We got to go meet his teacher, Mrs. Laura Lehman, yesterday. She is the same teacher that he had last year but they are at a different school in a new classroom. There are 8 kids in his class - all boys except one little girl. He was really excited to be able to ride the bus again. Poor Taegen - keeps asking when he gets to ride the bus.Waiting for the bus. Luckily this year he gets picked up at 8:35 instead of 7:50. We are actually in walking distance from the school but lucky lil' Kyler gets to ride the bus instead.
He looks so tiny getting on that BIG ole' bus.
Bye baby boy!

Thursday, July 23, 2009

Cornerstone Field Trip

Kyler's school had a field trip and went to the Hendricks County Fair. What a delight :)!! Me, Strider and Taegen tagged along. It was fun. It was on July 20th so I had the boys dressed in sleeveless shirts and shorts. It turned out to be 62 degrees and everyone else was in pants and jackets. I got the "Mother of the Year" award. It was awesome! Anyways, they had it set up where they got to pet a couple of the 4H animals. This picture is of the boys petting a goat. (even the goat had a jacket on it was so cold. Again...mother of the year)
This was 9 piglets. They were so cute. The poor mama finally gave in and let them all eat. Poor lady - it's hard enough having to feed one or two but NINE!!
Oh...the baby calf.
Kyler petting a horse. The lady holding Kyler is named C.J. and she is the owner of Cornerstone. She is a Physical Therapist and does Hippotherapy and stuff too. She is SO great with the kids. Taegen was too scared to touch the horse but he touched all the other animals. I love watching Taegen with Kyler. When Kyler is scared Taegen says "come on Kyler. Hold my hand." and then he walks with him. (refer to the above pic for an example)
At the end, each kid in his class had to order and pay for their snacks. They really do work GREAT with these kids. I'm going to miss it when it ends and Brownsburg School starts. This is Strider looking a little leery of the bunny.
So fun...it actually was fun to go to the fair and have help with the boys. They got to see a ton of animals (horses, cows, sheep, goats, pigs, hens, bunnies, turkeys, ducks, etc). They LOVED it. One successful field trip down....five thousand and thirty three left!

Tuesday, July 21, 2009

Twins?

Nobody ever asks if the boys' are twins anymore? I can't quite figure out why.

Friday, July 17, 2009

Chocolate Chip Pancakes and Eggs!!

Yum. Kyler...what's for dinner?

Thursday, June 4, 2009

Oatmeal...It's what's for Breakfast!

So I have always wanted to take a picture of Kyler after every single meal for an entire week. I have yet to do it. He is learning how to use utensils but hasn't mastered the skill yet. Half the time he uses his hands and half the time he uses a fork or spoon. This was what he looked like after breakfast this morning. And No, he didn't spill his bowl....this is just what he looks like after a successful meal.
Does this explain why my floor is ALWAYS messy!

Monday, June 1, 2009

Kyler Joe


I go in spurts. Sometimes I am really wanting connections to other people who have kids with Down syndrome. Other times...I'm totally okay without those connections. Right now...I need them!
I don't quite understand what my deal is. Lately, I have been re-reading a book "Gifts" that I got that is written by a bunch of moms who have kids with Down syndrome. I feel a connection to other moms who also have a child with DS. But why does that matter? I don't necessarily feel a connection to other mom's who have "normal" kids? So, what's the difference?
I have no idea.
At any rate, sometimes having a child with Down syndrome is difficult. I think of the "What if's". I think of his future and wonder what it holds for him. I compare him a lot to Taegen (since their twins) and I can see how delayed he is and also how un-delayed (is that a word) he is.
So...I have decided that I will have hard times accepting the Down syndrome. I will wonder. I will feel sad or mad or bad.
But mostly - I won't! So what if he has Down syndrome. He is smart, cute, funny, a jokster. He loves his brothers. He makes messes. He helps clean up. He makes me laugh all the time. He gives the best kisses. He is simply amazing. He has changed my life...just like my other two boys have done. He is just a little boy (who happens to have Down syndrome) and I LOVE HIM.

Monday, May 25, 2009

Summer Cuts!

The boys are ready for summer. Bring on the heat....
Spaghetti....it's what's for dinner!!!

Monday, April 27, 2009

Best Friends




Taegen and Kyler had their 3 year well check visit last week. They are both doing great and are healthy as horses :). Here are their stats:
Taegen:
weight 33 lbs - 65.03%
height 37 3/4 " - 59.47%
Kyler:
weight 28 lbs - 13 %
height 34 1/2 " - 2.24%
They are both fairly proportionate - not to each other but within themselves!
They are the best of friends.
The other day a little boy hit Kyler so Taegen pushed the little boy down. Then he proceeded to ask Kyler "You OK?". So cute! They really do take care and look out for each other. In the morning Taegen always asks "Mom, do I get to ride the bus?" I tell him "no, Kyler gets too." Instead of getting mad Taegen runs over to Kyler and says "Kyler want to ride the bus?" Taegen gets so excited for Kyler. Kyler is the strong one in the swimming pool and so he helps Taegen not be scared during their lessons. They really are PERFECT for each other. They really complement each other - ones weaknesses are the others strengths and vice versa. They are lucky to have each other and I am lucky to have them! (Precious)

re-thinking the dev. preschool?

This is what Kyler looked like when he came home from school the other day. I mean, who pulls their pants up this high unless your over the age of 63. Come on...I was feeling good about the school but then they go and pull a stunt like this....I don't know anymore :):)